3 Helpful ways to Improve Body Acceptance

Body acceptance might literally feel like the most challenging thing you could ever imagine doing.

AND yet, these are the vessels that contain the essence of who we are. All our love, hope, dreams, and desires are contained within this vital human suit. Without it we wouldn’t exist.

The society we live in currently, although slowly changing, has encouraged us to obsess about our bodies and our appearance. How they need to be improved, made smaller, be less wrinkly or saggy. And it causes us so much pain and stress. 

It is from this place of self-criticism and non-acceptance that we spiral down into unworthiness and constant self-judgement. Because we go everywhere in our bodies, our minds are constantly full of chatter about our unsatisfactory appearance. This can feel like torture if you don’t know what to do with what your thoughts are telling you.

I remember wearing jumpers and jerseys out on sunny days because I felt so painfully self-conscious about my arms and stomach. I would pretend that I was cold when someone asked me why I was wearing such warm clothing, even though the sweat was dripping down my spine. 

I remember a boyfriend asking me why I never wore shorts in the height of summer because I was so uncomfortable having my legs on display. When I look back now, I have nothing but love and compassion from my younger self. I wish I could go back and tell her that she was enough, that she was loving and warm and funny and kind and that it didn’t matter what her legs or arms looked like. She was so much more than that.

That younger me would’ve been horrified at older me sharing this picture you see of me in a bikini. She would’ve wanted me to photoshop it, smooth out the bumps and lumps, or at the very least crop the damn thing! 😄

But this photo reminds me of the incredibly special time I had with my son and amazing sister-in-law in Greece, where we mixed water into sand and made clay. And then smeared it all over our bodies. And then jumped into the water and washed it all off. And the smoothness of my skin afterwards. And the feel of the warm water on my body. I was present to it all. 

And that’s my wish for you. 🧡

What are you telling yourself about your body?

Where are you being unkind and critical, right now, even in this very moment? 

What is it costing you in terms of emotional pain and doing the things you’d love to do but aren’t because you think you need to lose weight or change your appearance first?

I would like to offer you a few strategies that will hopefully help you to ease your way towards body acceptance and freedom...

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1. Start with body neutrality

Realistically, it can be difficult to go from a place of self-judgment and criticism straight to total body acceptance and love. Think of it as getting the master’s degree, after going through your undergraduate and honours degrees! 🙂

It’s more helpful to start practicing body neutrality first as a good, solid foundation and it’s quite simple:

We do this by learning to differentiate between facts, judgments and opinions, and sensory experiences. That way we realise we have 3 different experiences to choose from when we are in relationship with our body. If this is the case, then we can learn to experience different body parts without the judgments.

Facts are the scientific and unarguable terms of your body – they are very neutral: ‘I have 10 fingers, 10 toes, 1 nose, 2 thighs, etc’

Judgements and opinions – ‘I have fat, dimply thighs, and they’re gross. Why can’t they be firmer or look better?’ 

Sensory experiences – these include bodily sensations – e.g. The physical sensation of experiencing your thigh from the inside out, as it exists and without judgements. Noticing what it feels like on the inside when you tense your thigh and then release it. It often helps to close your eyes and picture the inside of your body when doing this.

So, when you notice you’re unhelpfully judging, you can choose to shift over to the facts and your sensory experiences.

2. Body respect and appreciation

This is where we start to practice appreciating all the amazing things our bodies do for us that we aren’t even aware of, like beating our hearts and expanding our lungs so we can take in oxygen, digesting and breaking down food so that it can be eliminated from the body as waste. Imagine if these vital activities stopped working?!

It’s only when something goes terribly wrong with us or someone we know, when we become sick perhaps, that we realize how much our body’s health means to us.

Every time you catch yourself being critical of your body, see it as a challenge to shift to listing 3 things that you truly and authentically appreciate about your body and what it does for you.

3. Create a self-kindness statement

Choose a few sentences that you want to be intentional about saying to yourself repeatedly. Write them down on a piece of paper and put it in a place where you can see it. Take a photo of it and make it your home screen. Feel free to add new statements when you think of them.

Here are some examples to get you started:

• I respect myself and my body even if there are things I want to change, 

• What I eat says NOTHING about who I am or about me as a person, 

• I can go at my own pace. 

• I take care of my body each day in a way that feels good for me

What do you think? Are you willing to give these a try? 😀

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Making peace with your body is an ongoing process. 

It’s not going to be won and done in a day, in a week or even in a month. But if you’re willing to make a start by practising some of these strategies I’ve shared with you, you will be amazed at how differently you might treat your body in a few months’ time.

I want to invite you to relax into the process and see this as one of the most important investments you can make in yourself, your physical and mental health.

Until next time, take really good care of yourself

With love and a big virtual hug

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